A person I used to skate with reminded me of how I caught her daughter playing hooky and how I handled to situation. I'd forgotten all about this incident but Mom hadn't forgotten. Mom was still somewhat apologetic for her daughter's behavior even though her daughter now has two children who have finished high school.
Patti was a very nice, quiet, well behaved little girl. She did her work conscientiously. She was the kind of kid you liked to have in your class.
One day I had suspicions that Patti and her friend might skip the afternoon. I forget if I overheard something or if kids told me or if I found a note. Sure enough after lunch , Patti and her friend were not there.
The usual thing was to immediately send a note to the office and they would take care of it.
I didn't want this to go through the office as the kid had never been in trouble before. What should I do? Finally , I thought, "I'll phone her Mom and say that Patti wasn't in school and if she knew where Patti was. " Mom was sure Patti was to be in school and was very concerned when she knew Patti wasn't there. Now it was on Moms' shoulders to find her daughter and deal with the skipping of class.
I received a phone call later from Mom that she had found her daughter. Mom wanted to know what she should do as far as the school was concerned. Mom knew that there were consequences for skipping school. I knew that there would be consequences in Patti's home for her skipping class.
Well, I said, "If Patti apologizes to me we'll call it settled." It was a deal and Patti saw me the next day and apologized.
I'm sure Patti received the proper treatment at home and she never skipped again. I'm sure that this family now has this incident as one of their family stories.
So did you ever get caught and suffered an unusual conclusion?
awww. you were very sweet to keep it 'off book'. i'm sure she felt awful about it, too.
ReplyDeleteI think she caught it from Mom !
DeleteYou saved her! When I skipped and got my hair cut. My Mother refused to write me an excuse. Of course if you have no note you have to go see the principal. I told him "MY Mom did not write a note." Not wouldn't...not refused but didn't...not quite a lie but not the whole truth. He let me off:)
ReplyDeleteYou were probaly twice as good after that and did not take advantage of being let off.
DeleteI wonder if Patti's kids got away with it. Their mother might be more wise to the possibility than others.
ReplyDeletePatti had 4 kids and I'm pretty sure she was a good Mom.
DeleteFor that one time I played hooky for the afternoon, we were never caught. I told mom about it a couple of years ago and she was shocked. Then she laughed. You are definitely the sort of teacher I would love to have had.
ReplyDeleteThere always comes a time when we can admit some of our mistakes and they are forgiven. Hey, I could get pretty irritated and ipatient at times.
DeleteIt was a better solve
ReplyDeleteYou're right about that one.
DeleteYou were a very good teacher, Red. She learned more from having been "caught" by you than if she had a bad mark on her record. Wonder what her mother said to her. She never forgot it, that's for sure. :-)
ReplyDeleteI could be grouchy and impatient . So once in a while I got thins right.
DeleteI am sure that I did numerous things and have wonderfully forgotten all the punishments. It was very good of you to make sure she got the velvet hammer rather than the one that might be worse.
ReplyDeleteI think our memory sifts out the bad things and emphasizes the good .
DeleteI remember the last day of grade seven. There was a guy who'd been bothering me all year, a bully, bigger than me. Finally out in the yard that day he was hassling me, and I just took a swing, hit him hard, and knocked him out.
ReplyDeleteThe principal saw the whole thing. He asked why I did that, I said he'd been bothering me all year and I'd had enough, and lo and behold, I was surprised not to get in any trouble- this was a principal with a reputation for being no nonsense- but the other guy got blasted for it.
This is a great story. I'll bet you never looked back after this one and you probabl;y straightened out the bully.
DeleteYou handled that very well! I never did skip school - I rode the bus in from the country, and where would I go? I didn't dare do such a thing: there would be consequences from the home front.
ReplyDeleteThe key is consequences on th home front. Today too many parents do not give that support to their kids.
DeleteYou have good judgement. And great stories!!!! One has to respect the families you know who will dish out consequences. Some of mine like to explain away the behaviour. Those kids were reported. We had a detention hall in my 7/8 school. It was powerful. Much better than suspending kids, who would watch TV all day, with working parents!
ReplyDeleteYou're right about suspensions being served when parents aren't home.
DeleteI admire you for your pragmatic approach and not going 'through the system'. It is good that you knew and could trust the family. Today the family might well just blame you for the daughter's absence.
ReplyDeleteYou could really torque them when you asked them to give their own punishment.
DeleteI was a school-loving nerd and can't remember skipping class.
ReplyDeleteI love nerds! I used to tell the kids that I loved nerds.
DeleteI like the way you handled it and she didn't get in trouble with the school. Sometimes even the best students stray a little. It's forgivable.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure tht was her only baddie throughout her whole school career.
DeleteA few years ago the school bus driver who transported my kids to and from school told me that one day my teenage daughter was being so disruptive he put her off the bus and told her to walk (about 5 miles). We lived near the end of the bus run. When he completed the run he went home, got in his car and went back and gave her a ride home, concerned about how worried we, her parents, would be when she didn't arrive home and how much trouble she would be in. From that day on she was his model passenger and kept all the other kids in line as well. Sometimes the soft approach works better, huh?
ReplyDeleteI got dropped off the bus once. It waas a mile out of town. At the time we thought it was funny . But the shenanigans toned down.
ReplyDeleteRed, I like the way you managed your class. In my experience, I tried to keep the Office out of the situation if possible. It seemed like most kids appreciated it when I told them it would just make things worse if we had to get the Office involved. I enjoy your stories. John
ReplyDeleteI didn't know the word hooky but now I understand it is our word "spijbelen". I never did it I was too shy and not so brave to do so. And I always have loved to go to school I wouldn't think of missing it. But there were indeed children who didn't like it and tried to hook? A strange word to me sounds like a hoker.
ReplyDelete